Can I See My Child in An Open Adoption?
Each open adoption can look very different, depending on the birth mother, the adoptive family, and the child involved. When you’re making an adoption plan, you can choose what kind of contact you’d like to have with the adoptive family and with your child. For example, you might decide to have regular updates from the adoptive parents, especially when your child is small. You may decide to have occasional visits or phone calls. You may also decide that you’d value regular visits with your child. The choice is yours.
When you’re thinking about how to give a child up for adoption, you have many questions. In the past, many birth mothers chose closed adoption. They never saw their child again after the adoption. Years later, the child might have decided to find his or her birth parents, and through much effort, birth parents and adoptees were reunited. When you’re first considering an adoption plan, these past pictures of adoption may come into your mind. However, today adoption is quite different.
How to Ensure That Your Adoption is Open
Even before you find adoptive parents for your child, one of your jobs is to consider what kind of relationship you’d like to have with your child in the future. If you want a close relationship that involves visiting your child, it’s important that you choose adoptive parents who share your vision for future contact. I only work with couples who value their unique relationship with the birth mother and her family. These are adoptive parents who want an open adoption. They want a relationship on whatever terms a birth mother wants. This can be as little or as much contact is you want.
Choosing Closed Adoption
In the past, closed adoptions led to a lot of uncertainty for birth parents and adoptees. Adoptees might not have had information about their cultural or family history, or they might have lacked basic medical information about their family. Today, open adoptions mean that information can flow freely between the adoptive family and the birth parents. You also have the opportunity to develop a relationship with the adoptive family and with your child, should you wish to do so. Like any relationship, this takes effort and may have its ups and downs along the way, but open adoption provides a valuable opportunity.
When you’re thinking about open adoption or wondering if adoption is right for you, we can help.